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Thursday, June 30, 2005A Bad ShooterThat Botox Party sounded like a great idea at the time. To bad your friends are cheap and hired a bad shooter.As he went to grab another Manhattan, the needle just slipped out of the shooter's hands and plunged deep into your neck. You tried to stop the needle with your hand, but you had a few too many flirtinis. The only thing you succeeded in doing was driving the plunger down on the needle injecting the toxin deep into your throat. The botulinum toxin A, a close relative of botulism, seeps into your system. Your throat numbs and you begin sufficate. As your eyes close and the world fades to black, you dream about your days removing asbestos. (joe :: A Bad Shooter) Monday, June 20, 2005MesotheliomaAll that asbestos has to come out of walls sooner or later. Why not make a career out of removing it professionally?That mask is itchy. Loosening it won't hurt you... or will it. You breath in the asbestos fibers. They tiny sharp fiber tear at your lungs causing massive scaring. The fibrosis can lead to cancer. But how long does it take to effect you. After exposure to the deadly fiber, it can be as long as 20, 30 or even 40 years before you begin to notice something's wrong, but by then it is too late. Once you have it, you'll be lucky to live another 2 years. The good news comes for your family. You better get yourself a personal injury lawyer. If you have mesothelioma, your family (and your lawyer) will get a lot of cash. But you've got two more years, plenty of time for another career. (joe :: Mesothelioma) The Black LungHey there, Mr. Miner. Do you have some shortness of breath? Is it getting worse?I bet you regret working in the coal mine now. The years of coal dust building up in your lungs, slowly making it more difficult to breath. The dust begins scaring the tissue of your lungs. Fibrosis sets in. Spot appear on your lungs. You've got coal workers' pneumoconiosis. But you can't give up the mines. Over time the condition worsens. The right half of your heart begins to enlarge. It's called cor pulmonale; it can cause heart failure. But maybe you were lucky and/or smart and left the mine. You could still lead a normal life. But maybe it's too late, there could be massive scaring leading to your premature death. Too bad your next profession is removing asbestos. (joe :: The Black Lung) |
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